The Second installment of my three part blog series
“My Healing Journey with Fibromyalgia and Reiki”
Being diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue/Fibromyalgia was a traumatic life crisis for me. It left me in a state of shell shock that became a paralyzing void within my mind, body and soul. As the disease progressed I kept seeing images of myself standing in the middle of a devastated field after a huge bomb explosion. I was covered in dirt and ash as I stumbled and swerved around the ruins of what had once had been my life. How did this happen? What did I do to lose my life as I did? The intensity of my grief seeped into my body taking residence with other stored suppressed and unexpressed emotional wounds of my life.
I had a successful career in corporate dentistry but was becoming increasingly unhappy and dissatisfied with it. The insensitivity and cruelty of the corporate world I worked in drained me in anger and frustration. I began to sense that something was wrong within my body. I couldn’t pinpoint it, but the body in all its wisdom was sending me warnings me that something was physically wrong. I attributed it to stress and increased my physical workouts to vent my anger and frustrations.
I began reading self help books which were seeds to my future career, but at the time were just life boats for me to grasp on in a raging ocean. I could not shake the increased warnings that my body was sending me that I was in serious trouble. What was interesting about these warnings was that it wasn’t necessarily physical sensations I felt but strong feelings. Now I know it was my angels and intuition trying to alert me to my impending physical crash. But back then angels were not what I was listening to. I was only listening to my own conditioned ambition and revengeful anger at my corporate career.
The “crash” that triggered the Chronic Fatigue/Fibromyalgia began after I was fired from the corporate world. My corporate career was only about profits not people. I made the “mistake” of putting staff and patients first which though it increased profits and production angered higher ups with my advocacy.
Finally in the end I stood up to the “wrong person” in my efforts for fair and just treatment of staff and patients. I was fired and escorted out the door in the middle of working with a patient. But now as I look back it was not the “wrong person” I stood up to but the right one. The Universe moved in to take me out of this toxic situation and save me from myself.
My physical health shattered in pieces as I grew weaker and weaker from the Chronic Fatigue/Fibromyalgia after my termination. My life became a series of endless days and nights lying in a recliner or bed. I began to realize I was more then physically ill, I was emotionally ill from intense grief. The years preceding this latest life crisis were full of one loss after another that I had never fully worked through.
I tried to stay focused on the many blessings that occurred during and after these losses. But I left suppressed and unexpressed the intense grieving of these past life events which were unbeknownst to me draining me of my life force energy.
I began to feel a strong pull to read a book I had bought a few years earlier and didn’t care for at the time. I know now I bought it so I would have it as soon as I needed it. The book was titled “Entering the Castle” Finding the Inner Path to God and Your Soul’s Purpose by Carolyn Myss based on the mystical teachings of Teresa of Avila.
The book included seven practices of self talk and reflection that were intense. I began to become aware of a shift in my soul and spirit as my suppressed and unexpressed sorrows began to loosen their grips within me. Spiritually a path revealed itself to me as I took my first steps on My Healing Journey of Fibromyalgia and Reiki.
Next: The Gift of My Healing Journey with Fibromyalgia and Reiki.
“A Journey of Faith and Healing”
to read additional articles posted by Mary Jane Brigger on career, faith, spirituality and healing.
Mary Jane Brigger
Mary Jane is a Reiki Master/Teacher who brings compassionate Reiki healing energy to people whose lives are frozen in grief from transitions brought on by life crisis, illness, or death. Mary Jane’s clients describe her channeled healing energy as “peaceful” as they re-awaken to their True Self and connect back to their bodies in balance and harmony.
Mary Jane is founder and owner of Soul Care Experience which provides healing services for people and their pets with Reiki and The The Body Story ™ Experience.. She is a Reiki Master/Teacher and Body Story™ Expert on the faculty of The Missing Thread Mystery School in San Francisco, CA. Mary Jane is a Midwife to the Dying for both people and animals and volunteers locally providing Reiki to hospice patients and their families.
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